Imagine That

For many many years my heart has bled for people who have struggled with image. Having been through my own identity crisis myself, not knowing who I was and desiring to be someone, I know how hard it can be.

Let me give you some background....Hmmm do I really want to share this? Oh well, here I go. I have struggled with the concept of image and looking good for years. At 24 years of age, I still have never been kissed and never had a boyfriend. I mean really, there is nothing wrong with me, I just have high standards is what I would say. But deep down I kept asking myself..."What is wrong with me?" And, to be honest, I was lied to by people I care about as to what a guy really looks for and how I dont match up to the standards. Since being large my whole life, anytime I would ask why I did not have a boyfriend, I would be told something along the lines of "Emily, guys are visual people. Maybe if you lost some weight guys would want to date you." Man that really messed with me. I questioned God. Why am I like this? What did I ever do to you God?

The question is, why do I mention this now? Do I want you to feel sorry for me? NO! What I am saying is that this gives you background as to the life that I have lived.

I am here to share with you that God has restored me and given me the truth. Are guys visual people? Sure they are,but we are too. But is that all they look for? NO! I want someone to fall in love with my heart, not the way I look. One can argue that there must be a "physical attraction" whatever that means. What does that actually mean? That is an answer that I am trying to still figure out.

But I can say one thing.....

My heart bleeds for people who only see themselves through the distorted mirror of our media. Friends, that is not reality! Just watch this for proof! The questions lies then, what is our identity found in? Is it new clothes, purses, makeup, going the gym? Friends, I can tell you that these things are temporary and will never fullfill you. But, you and I both buy into these lies. I am just as guilty as wanting to have my hair done, cute clothes, new bags, new car, more money,but do I find who I am in these things? Sometimes, but I am learning better. Please don't get me wrong, owning these things are not bad, but we MUST evaluate our heart for owning these things. Do we think that we are better people for owning them? These things fade and no matter how much of these things I have, I still am left empty and wanting more.


So again, where is our identity supposed to lay? I must try to find my identity in my creator, Jesus Christ. He is the one who created me and I should strive to be more like Him. I am eternally grateful that He created me the way I am. In order to truly understand ourselves and who we are, we must study the one who created us. I can try compare it to studying a Monet painting. If you were going to study it, you would most likely study the artist and what his inspiration was and what he desired to convey. This also holds true to the Creator of us. We must study who He is and what he desires for our lives to truly understand identity.

So going back to the beginning. It does not matter if you are "fat," "ugly," "poor," "homely," "Insert word here." You were created for a purpose and a plan. Continue to look toward the one who created you and NOT to the media who desires to change you.

Friends, you are loved! You ARE beautiful!